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Lots of people are now calling their phones 'the fresh horror device' because of the state of the world

*gets push notification* OH, WHAT NOW?

khmVB1485461603 Flickr Flickr

WE’RE NOT EVEN an entire month into 2017 and it appears to be doing its utmost to compete with 2016 for the title of Worst Year Ever.

Since the beginning of the year, we’ve been treated to enough nightmarish scandals to fill an entire episode of Reeling in the Years. Golden showers, alternative facts, fake news, Hughie Maughan’s fake tan — it’s neverending.

In many instances, the harbinger of said nightmarish news is your mobile phone, which has led many to regard their phones as an unwanted bearer of bad news.

Behold, the fresh horrors device.

ihpone Flickr Flickr

The home of bad news and horrifying push notifications.

Twitter was once a place to share jokes and funny cat photos. Now it exists solely to increase your blood pressure.

Scrolling through your phone in bed is now a high-risk activity

The stress of it. Seriously, Twitter and Facebook need to come with a health advisory.

It’s gotten to the point that you now welcome prolonged spells away from your phone…

It’s nothing short of a horror show.

This is your life now.

Screaming, crying and wondering how the world got here.

Oh, for the days when your phone was just a device you used to send free “Call me” texts and play Snake

God damn you, 2017.

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Author
Amy O'Connor
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